Living Authentically

This is something else that is a very trendy thing to hear being tossed around.  Live your most authentic life...  Be your most authentic self… and while this is definitely the best way to live, most people do not live this way because to get there is hard work.  Rewarding by all means, but hard work, nonetheless. 

Living authentically means letting go of that mask that your ego has carefully crafted to try and get you to fit in with the masses and have people like you.  It’s choosing honesty with yourself over wasting energy performing for others... which frees up a lot of headspace and energy to do what truly brings you joy and makes you happy.

When you are not living authentically, the chances that you are in alignment with your life’s purpose is very slim… and because of that, your life may feel empty, hollow.  You can check all the boxes - house, car, spouse, large bank balance, kids, a pet, social status in your town - but you will still feel lonely and disconnected and most likely out of place.  Living in alignment means that you are not compromising your needs, your values, your desires and when you do that, even the most difficult things you encounter throughout life do not feel as hard - because you have a purpose.  It automatically becomes framed as a learning experience instead of a major roadblock.  Everything feels more meaningful… because they are.

Living authentically also builds deeper relationships.  When you are living according to your true values, beliefs, and are in alignment you will attract those who are also living that same way.  Because there is no performative aspect to your personality, you are able to connect deeper in friendships, romantic relationships, professional collaborators or partners, and so on.  It’s not about being perfect - only the ego wants perfect.  Authentic can be messy, but it’s genuine.  It isn’t just about “being yourself” on the surface — it’s about embracing the parts of you that you’ve hidden, denied, or judged.  Shadow work and authenticity go hand in hand. If you only live from the polished version of yourself, you are still wearing the mask your ego built to feel safe.

To live authentically, you have to welcome your shadow too.  That means:

• Owning your emotions - letting yourself feel anger, sadness, joy, and fear without shame.

• Acknowledging your needs - even the ones you’ve been taught are “too much” or “not enough.”

• Setting healthy boundaries - this enforces respect from yourself and others

• Recognizing my patterns - especially the ones that keep you stuck in the same unhappiness.

• Choosing honesty — not just with others, but with yourself about what you want, what you value, and what you are afraid of.

• Living with purpose — navigating your life with purpose and being true to what brings you joy.

Authenticity through shadow work is about integration. It’s me saying: All of me belongs here. Even the messy parts. Even the parts I thought I had to hide. The more I accept those pieces, the less I have to perform, and the more my life lines up with who I really am.

“My truth is my freedom. When I live as myself, I live in alignment.”